Distance Could Be the Key
by maryhell
Summary: Dr. Spencer Reid joins the BAU and receives some lessons in life. Will he cope or will it be too much for him? What will he do?
1. Chapter 1

**DISTANCE COULD BE THE KEY - Chapter 1 - Hello and Goodbye**

**Diclaimer - I own nothing relating to Criminal Minds, no infringement intended. Only the plot is mine.**

_**Author's Note**_

This is my first venture into Criminal Minds, though not my first into ffn. I am going to assume that anyone reading is a fan of CM and familiar with the basics of most of the characters. Therefore as this is a very short story (4 chapters), I will not delve deep into some areas such as character descriptions – y'all know what they look like (if not, look them up online) and I won't be changing anything about their physical looks. Their pasts, however, I have played with. Morgan didn't get assaulted early in life and Reid hardly remembers his father and didn't have his encounter with Tobias Henkle. JJ hasn't met the love of her life yet and remains communication liaison. Other little things are different too, but I'm not going to go into them all in this Author's Note as it would give the story away.

This story doesn't go into as much detail as my other stories due to the lack of research on my behalf. This is because this fic just wouldn't shut up in my head, and I was too impatient, so I got it written down as quickly as I could, and it probably shows. Therefore, apologies in advance, for any disappointments or cock-ups.

**Huge thank you's go to Bellemeer, D Kinney and Harrytwifan. I am always learning from you guys - it's an honor and pleasure to work with you.**

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_**Chapter 1 **_

Growing up, life was lonely for Spencer Reid. He could barely remember his father, therefore, his mother, Diana Reid, was his life—he adored her. When he had her committed to the sanatorium for schizophrenia, it was the most difficult thing he'd had to do. He beat himself up mentally for a long time, before and after the event, but thankfully, during one of her lucid moments, she understood why, and assured him that he'd done the right thing. Spencer wanted to stay close to his Mom, be there for her, but Diana told him that it would be a travesty to keep a brain such as his in one place and that he needed to go find a job that would keep it and him active.

Throughout his life, Spencer always tried to make his mom proud, so he stayed focused on his education. The ugly side of this meant that it earned him ultra-nerd status wherever he went. Unfortunately, along with that status, he received regular beatings for both his age and ability from people that didn't consider him or his actions those that fit in with the norm.

Reid knew the theory of social interaction, and despite many attempts at following the guidelines, he always failed. Thus, he became socially awkward, unable to grasp what to do for the best, warring between his brain and peer acceptance and the kick-backs it created. Hence, his trust was not something that was given freely.

Through FBI training, Reid discovered that his instructors were more interested in his brain than his inept attempts at peer interaction, as was always the way in recent years.

His FBI training had identified specific skills. He was an extremely adept psychological profiler, with strengths in; geographic profiling, cryptology, and discerning patterns. Dr. Spencer Reid had pretty much his choice of departments, but chose the Behavioral Analysis Unit because of the tests he was sure it would give him, both mentally and physically, and not in small part to the lobbying that Erin Strauss, the BAU's Unit Chief, did to ensure he signed on the dotted line.

Spencer set foot in the BAU with an IQ of 187, an eidetic memory, and the ability to read 20,000 words per minute. He held doctorate degrees in Mathematics, Chemistry, and Engineering as well as Bachelor's Degrees in Psychology and Sociology, and was studying for a Bachelor's Degree in Philosophy, too.

Life for Spencer Reid had never been 'normal' and with his chosen career ahead of him, that wasn't going to change any time soon

The day Dr. Spencer Reid stepped into the bullpen and his eyes fell on the perfect form of SSA Derek Morgan, he began an education of a different kind. To Spencer, SSA Derek Morgan had a softness about him, yet according to his file, was a hardened Chicago cop. His features were flawless and as soon as he stood to greet him, Spencer's mouth went dry at the outstanding outline of the athletic Adonis before him. He was chocolate sauce without the calories. A delicious mug of coffee that was screaming to be drunk until every drop was drained. Spencer wanted to be the cream in Morgan's coffee.

Seeing that he was a boy genius, he had the college education and then some. But it all happened at such a young age, he'd never old enough to really emperiment, or even flirt, like other college kids. He wasn't stupid, though; he knew himself and he knew his body. He wasn't confused over which gender made his heart race—he'd known since puberty that chemical reactions happened at certain ages. The evidence in the journals was irrefutable and he accepted it.

At college, he had eyes, even if he didn't interact. When looking at some males, his body felt things and had urges that didn't happen when looking at females. He immediately researched what his body was feeling, much like an experiment, and given the data before him, agreed with the overwhelming conclusion that he was gay.

Of course, he kept this information to himself; not that there was anyone to share it with. No college kids were prepared to interact with a fourteen year old. During this time, he also discovered the delights of the five knuckle shuffle as a proven remedy of relieving tension. As soon as college was over, Spencer came out to his mom, who after questioning his reasoning –– given that he'd never been in a relationship –– agreed with his conclusions and accepted him with open arms. There was never any doubt that she would; he was the light of her life and always would be.

The education he was about to embark on was the one known as 'Wandering Eyes' and 'Down Boy'. He weighed up his options. He considered shutting himself in the bathroom, or keeping his eyes closed, but that would be a little too conspicuous. A more viable possibility would be to ensure there was no space between his desk and his stomach in the hope that the platform hiding his embarrassment wouldn't rise off the floor. He had to come up with ways to deflate his body's reaction to Derek Morgan.

So that the team would not suspect, Reid divided his attention equally between its members, who were at the time:

Aaron Hotchner – Senior Supervisory Agent and Unit Chief

Jason Gideon – Senior Supervisory Agent

Derek Morgan – Supervisory Special Agent and Tactical Trainer

Elle Greenaway – Supervisory Special Agent

Jennifer Jareau – Communications Liaison

Penelope Garcia – Technical Analyst

In the early months, Reid caught on to and used the fact that the team simply thought him as shy and a little weird. This gave Spencer the time he needed to find remedies to his 'situation'. His messenger bag had the duel application of holding his files and covering any 'reactions'. Over time, Reid found his comfort zone within the team. He could see that they accepted his ways, though it was difficult for them on occasion.

Efforts were made to include Spencer in their social and team-building gatherings. However, most of the time, he would end up somewhere else in the club with someone who insisted on testing his knowledge of Star Trek trivia. This often suited Reid as it allowed him to observe without getting involved. When he had enough, he'd usually just leave.

The girls always stayed as a unit, arriving and leaving together. Aaron would only ever have one drink before leaving to go home to his family, Gideon never attended the club, he hated them, and Morgan... well, he stayed until he picked up someone he wanted to spend the night with and relieve some 'tension' with. Usually one, though sometimes two females.

By the time a couple of years passed, Spencer made a niche for himself within team—it was almost unavoidable. It seemed to him that his brain was a valuable commodity and was put to good use. A good proportion of the work he found fascinating. He enjoyed finding the cracks in an unsub's (Unknown Subject, basically the person or persons responsible for the crime) planning, finding the patterns they unknowingly made, or cracking the codes they cleverly left.

However, some of the gruesome sights they'd seen, investigated, and lived through also gave him and the team common ground. But it wasn't the sort of common ground that could easily be lived with –– especially those involving children. Some experiences were close calls for the team as well as the unsub's victims. On occasion they were too late, and these times weighed heavily on them all. Each had their own forms of unwinding. Spencer tended to write what he could in letters to his mom before visiting the zoo or going to see several films, sinking himself into an alternate universe for a while.

Eventually, Elle found it too much of a strain and left, to be replaced shortly after, by the rock steady SSA, Emily Prentiss. She, in Reid's eyes, was by far the best at compartmentalization—very little fazed her. Everything about her screamed "Don't mess with me." Some thought she was hard, but she did have a caring side to her nature which came out to play at various times.

Garcia, the tech wiz who truly was the font of all knowledge –– well, knowledge that could be found in electronic format –– called Reid her Little Boy Genius, despite the fact that he towered over her. Garcia could hack any system anywhere, and leave no trace that she'd ever been there. Reid found it as no surprise that she knew everything about him that could be found on record.

He was thankful, though, that she was a good enough colleague to keep it to herself, abiding by his wishes to keep some things private—especially details of his mother and family situation. He would protect his mom at all costs. He also did everything he could to keep his sexual orientation out of the public forum. He made sure all those feelings were locked away behind several invisible brick walls. He was determined to keep some things private, because at times he felt like a shop where people came, took what they want, then left.

Despite trying to surreptitiously keep his distance, he found himself drawn to Morgan. In many ways, it was impossible to avoid him, despite the fact that his heart ached at every encounter. The guy considered himself team protector and friend to all, unless you were the unsub; then, not even God could help.

He lived up to that reputation too, being friendly and huggy with everyone within the team, except for Hotch—no one hugged Hotch intentionally. Aaron Hotchner stayed the steadfast, loyal to a fault, head of the team. The man that kept them all focused and ready for action.

Reid found it weird and yet not unwelcome when Morgan invaded his personal space. It wasn't something he was used to from anyone but his mother.

Morgan affectionately called Reid 'Pretty Boy', and frequently ruffled his hair with a smile and mirth in his tone. Reid had no idea why. He didn't do it to the girls. Maybe they'd shoot him if he ever messed with their carefully preened styles. Perhaps Morgan saw him as the child of the group. The girls definitely liked to coddle him; it seemed that he brought out their mothering instincts. This irked him at times, but he didn't say anything... he always kept non-work related thoughts to himself.

The more Reid got to know Morgan, the more he liked him. As a result, the more his heart broke. Working daily with someone you had feelings for took its toll on his soul. What he thought was initially infatuation, he knew was turning into something more, but week after week he'd see Morgan score at a club, never leaving alone, never leaving with him. He knew Morgan was the one person he would never have. Reid also resigned himself to the fact that he just might get the record for being the oldest living virgin—discounting those that made it a life choice.

Reid's privacy meant everything to him, but part of him wanted to shout out his frustrations to the world. However, an even bigger, more powerful part of him constructed another wall. Despite all this protection, things were starting to get him down. He knew how to put on a face, though; he'd been doing it all his life.

Reid, along with the rest of the team, was shocked when Gideon decided he wanted to get away from it all and left. He'd always considered Gideon to be the one that could most successfully get inside the unsub's head. Spencer tried to put himself into his colleague's shoes, and came to the conclusion that Gideon simply didn't want to see through the eyes of an unsub any more. His skill was different to Reid's; Reid was primarily analytical, problem solving to the nth degree, whereas Gideon tended to mind-meld with the unsub. It was no wonder he needed time out.

Reid eventually found a true friend and father figure in the man that replaced Gideon; David Rossi - author and man of the world. His books were considered essential reading for anyone interested in criminology, let alone profiling. He'd been there, seen it, done it, and bought the T-Shirt. He lay somewhere between Gideon and Reid. He had an analytical mind, but was able to get inside the head of the unsub as well.

Reid got on very well with Rossi, having many debates and discussions on his theories. He knew that the older agent didn't have any offspring and he was happy to let Rossi treat him like the son he never had. The young agent was over the moon to have someone in his life that acted like a father. Reid let Rossi take him under his wing. After a while, Reid started to open up to him about anything and everything, and even came out of the closet to him.

Rossi never forced any information out of Reid; it was all given voluntarily. Reid did, however, keep his growing feelings for Morgan out of it. Rossi never made a joke of him going off on a ramble. If Reid needed to be shut up, he did it with respect. Whenever he could, he took the time to listen, and when he couldn't, he always came back to the conversation later. There was nothing sexual about their friendship, just one based on mutual respect and a need of sorts, almost symbiotic. Rossi always wanted a son and Reid, deep down, wanted a father.

Reid noticed that Morgan took a while to warm up to Rossi. On one occasion, he took Reid to one side and questioned him about his relationship with the much older agent, but backed off when Reid told him that Rossi was like the father he never had. After that, Morgan tried to talk to Reid about family and friends, asking many questions, but Spencer expertly diverted those conversations in a bid to keep his private life, private. A voice inside him told him not to get too close, as he would never survive the rejection.

Sometimes he had interactions with Morgan that caused his thoughts to veer toward what he was convinced would never be, but he put it down to rose-colored glasses and wishful thinking. He wanted to let Morgan in, but after everything was said and done, he was the nerd with the brain that everyone wanted. No one wanted to know Reid the person, except for Rossi that is, and most definitely no one on the known planet wanted Reid in a sexual way. He knew statistics could prove that theory wrong, but in Reid's universe, he considered it to be true

Through Rossi's friendship, and the knowledge he gained within the BAU, Spencer became an excellent and experienced agent, willing and able to put his life at risk for the safety of others and the team. On several occasions, he talked down an unsub through his logical arguments and quick thinking, even though logic in the traditional sense was far from an unsub's mind. Reid was able to adapt his logic to that of the unsub and was thus successful.

Most of his triumphs with unsubs lay in the interrogation room, where only the power of the brain came into play. Out in the field, however, it was a different matter. When it came to enforcing the strong arm of the law, he was still considered the baby of the team. He was protected and treated as such by all except Rossi, and to a degree Hotch, but even he bowed to the strengths of the individuals in the team, which was understandable.

There had been three particularly bad cases in quick succession –– all brutal and all involving children. Reid, along with everyone else, felt wiped out. It took a particularly bad toll on the youngest member of the team, and Reid could almost visualize the looks of concern bouncing off his invisible walls. During the final flight home, he simply curled up in a corner, closed his eyes, and retreated into his head. He didn't even let Morgan or Rossi in; when they tried, he ignored all their efforts.

The cases sent him into a tailspin, making him evaluate how he saw the world. He knew he was doing a good job and making a difference –– he was proud of that –– but at what cost to his own sanity? It affected all agents in different ways. How would it affect him? What would happen to his mom if he lost it?

On landing early in the morning, Hotch announced that they could all have a week off. Reid almost ran from the plane, immediately returning to his apartment. He packed a fresh bag and boarded the next available flight to Vegas to see his mom. He would never leave without someone knowing where he was, so he sent a quick text off to Rossi telling him his destination, knowing that he would keep it quiet, and only letting the information out in the case of an emergency. He then turned off his phone until further notice.

When he reached his mom, he broke down in tears. He needed help sorting out his thoughts. Diana held her son and let him weep. During the following three days, Diana kept lucid enough to let Spencer talk out everything to her. He told her about how the last cases really got to him, and that his compartmentalizing was beginning to fail, resulting in headaches. He realized then that the darkness invading his mind hadn't begun or ended with the last three cases; it crept up on him like a slow moving mist. It was, however, the last three cases that compounded the images and feelings.

During the verbalization of his thoughts and fears, he confessed his feelings toward Morgan. How he knew it would never go anywhere, given that everything he witnessed and heard, screamed the guy was a straight, alpha male. He proved it every Friday night.

Reid listened as Diana gave him all the assurances only a mother could. She told him how pure of mind and beautiful he was. She advised him of his options, then told him that no matter what he decided or where he was, she was always only a flight, phone call, or letter away. That she was always with him in heart, if not always in person, and that she would enjoy hearing of his adventures, no matter where they be. Whatever his decision regarding his future, it would be his choice and she'd support him.

Four days into his leave, Reid returned home. His brain hadn't stopped thinking over everything his mother said to him. One thing in particular had struck a chord... He knew what he had to do; he had to find himself. Discover who he, Spencer Reid—not just Dr. Spencer Reid—really was, give himself memories other than statistics or pictures of death. Give his brain more places to retreat to.

For the last five years, Spencer hadn't done anything with his earnings except pay his and his mother's bills and save the rest. He had enough to go on an adventure of self-discovery, and he was going to do it student-style; backpacking. This method also ensured that a little money went a long way. Part of him was afraid, but a bigger part of him was excited, looking forward to experiencing for himself the things he'd read in books. He would miss his books, but there were libraries around the world.

Spencer decided that there was no time like the present, so he wrote his mother a letter, and packed. As he was about to leave his apartment, he turned his phone back on. The screen lit up with texts from the team, ten of which were from Morgan. They were all messages of concern for his wellbeing. Shedding a few tears at their kind sentiments, he was touched, but they didn't know the real him. Which on reflection, was his choice.

As far as Spencer was concerned, he saw himself as one cog in a well-oiled machine. There were others that would fill his place. Maybe not in the same format, but he would still be replaced, as was the norm in all organizations.

He didn't see any problems in his departure. The girls would still have their private sorority, eventually finding someone else to mother. Hotch would still lead, efficiently and with focus. Rossi would understand, once he explained, and Morgan would still go to bars and pick up whatever female was willing who caught his eye. Not seeing Morgan every day would break his heart, but it was breaking anyway, so he might as well leave, in the hope that time and space would give him peace.

He turned the phone off. Considering the wording on the texts from Garcia, he knew she would be tracking his signal and he didn't want that. He didn't want any barriers to stop him doing what he needed to do. The fact that his signal briefly went live meant that she knew he was back in Virginia.

With his passport, money, and full backpack, the first person he went to see was Rossi; to say his goodbyes and make a few extra arrangements.

Rossi listened while Reid explained what he was doing and why. He agreed with Reid's reasoning, thinking it to be a wise decision. Rossi always thought that travel broadened the mind and gave a person a better perspective on life.

Deep down, however, he knew that Reid was running from more than just the job. Reid never said anything, but he saw it in his eyes every time he looked at Morgan. He thought at times that Morgan noticed Reid in a non-professional capacity, but he was too busy proving his male prowess with his next conquest to see how much it hurt Reid. Unfortunately, Rossi knew that feelings were not always reciprocated. and that each individual had to deal with the consequences in their own way—one that was right for them.

Rossi considered himself to be Reid's godfather. In a bid to keep in touch and look after the young man, he gave Reid a list of his properties around the world, telling him that he was welcome to stay at any of them for as long as he wished, as his guest. Rossi could see the appreciation in Reid's face as he accepted the gesture, saying that he would probably take him up on at least couple of those offers, especially the ones in Italy and Greece.

With Dave's help, the next person Spencer saw was Hotch. Rossi could relate to Reid's reluctance to go into the office unless he had to, for fear of bumping into Garcia, who was sure to pump him for answers. So, Rossi arranged for Hotch to pay him a visit at his home. Using his BAU access codes, he downloaded the forms that would be required for Reid's resignation to be complete. Hotch being at Rossi's made Reid comfortable enough to explain some of his reasons for leaving, though he didn't go into as much detail as he had earlier, with him.

Hotch wasn't happy at Reid's departure; he considered him a valuable member of the team. But seeing the resolve on the young agent's face, had no choice but to accept it. Reid completed the paperwork in record time, as was his way.

Unfortunately, despite his efforts to avoid it, Spencer had to go into the office for a short while so that he could clear out his desk. Hotch took him in, with Rossi following. He still had to file the paperwork with Strauss, and he wanted to have a few private words of support and wisdom with Reid before he left for good.

While at Quantico, Spencer surrendered his ID and gun, retrieved a few things from his desk, and got under way as quickly as he could. He couldn't help but shed a few tears en-route.

Just as he entered the elevator, he heard his name being called. Looking up, he saw Garcia and Morgan running towards him. Unable to speak due to the lump in his throat and the thundering in his heart, he gave them a small wave just as the doors closed with a thud.

"Goodbye, Morgan," he whispered to himself.

Rossi was waiting outside to take Reid to the airport. While at his home, Rossi had booked Reid onto the next available flight out of the USA, which to his joy and relief, happened to be to Italy. While he was waiting, he called the housekeeper at his villa and made arrangements for Reid's stay. He hoped Reid would spend a good while there gathering his thoughts, before setting off on his adventures.

Morgan and Garcia had both been worried about Reid's state of mind, so she programmed her computer to ping as soon as Reid's phone came back online, letting her know where the built-in locator placed Reid. As soon as it did, she called Morgan, who immediately went to Reid's apartment, only to receive no answer at his door. Fearing the worst, he even picked the lock to gain access, but found the place empty. The boy had gone off the grid again and it frustrated him.

Despite Reid never 'letting him in' so to speak, he still felt protective of him. It was something that started the day he walked into the BAU, and grew over time.

Reid had disappeared so quickly after their plane landed, that he didn't get the chance to see if he was okay. He and everyone on the plane could tell something was terribly wrong. The young genius, Morgan's 'Pretty Boy' became quieter and more distant from the team with the passing of each recent case. When asked about his wellbeing, his only reply was, "I'm fine, I have work to do". Reid was focused to the exclusion of all else during the investigations, and Morgan hoped that things would settle a little once the case concluded and they had some time off.

Unfortunately, despite all their efforts on the last case, things hadn't ended well, resulting in the deaths of two more children before the unsub was finally apprehended. He intended to tackle Reid about it on their return, but during the flight, Reid tuned everyone out, including Rossi. Then, upon landing, by the time he picked up his bag and turned around, his 'Pretty Boy' was gone. Not only gone from the plane, but his apartment too, as Morgan discovered when he turned up there later that day, only to be told by the little old lady next door that Reid wasn't at home. He originally figured that he'd give Reid time to sleep before turning up on his doorstep. What a miscalculation that was!

When Morgan spoke to Rossi, the cryptic answer of, 'He's gone to where he needs to be', suggested Rossi knew where he was, but was keeping tight-lipped about the where, which got Morgan even more frustrated.

Penelope wasn't much better. Guessing where Reid could have disappeared to, she checked airline passenger lists and knew that Reid had gone to Vegas. However, she couldn't break a promise, not even for her Chocolate Stud Muffin, especially when she knew Reid would be safe with his mom. She gave Morgan the same answer that Rossi did. Morgan left the room with a growl and a slammed door.

Garcia knew 'Boy Genius' would come back in his own good time. When he did, he would turn on his phone to announce his arrival. What she didn't expect was for him to disappear again, only to reappear briefly, before disappearing yet again as the lift doors closed on his small farewell wave. The box in his arms and the tears streaming down his face told her that this disappearance had the mark of permanence.

They both stood there for a minute, stunned, before Morgan suddenly darted for the stairs, his stomach churning. Something was telling him to run, and run fast. He made it down to the parking garage in record time, but to no avail... Reid's car was nowhere to be seen. He didn't know that Rossi had been Reid's quick getaway.

With a heavy heart weighing him down like lead shackles, Morgan returned to the office.

Upon his return, Penelope gave him the news that everyone had been called in. They both had an ominous feeling, but didn't want to hear or believe it.

Aaron waited, quietly assessing his team as they gathered in the bullpen. Obviously, Rossi and Reid were missing. Strauss was there too, seriously pissed off at Aaron for accepting Reid's resignation without consulting her. Aaron had been the buffer between them, taking the flack so that Reid wouldn't be subjected to the bureaucratic bullshit that she was bound to spout. It was all he could do now for the youngest agent that had ever joined the BAU.

Not wanting to wait any longer for Rossi, Strauss scathingly made the announcement that Dr. Spencer Reid had resigned, effective immdiately, and that they had to choose a replacement from the files before them. She flew out on her broomstick as quickly as she'd flown in.

After a couple of minutes of silence, the questions and second guessing began. Aaron thought it best to let them all vent for a while before he cut in.

Why?

Why now?

Why didn't he come to us?

I can't believe he's gone!

We can't replace him.

At that moment Rossi walked in, and was greeted with a chorus of unbelieving, "Reid's resigned."

Aaron noticed that Rossi was emotional; he'd known him long enough to be able to differentiate between the looks of cool, pissed off, and a range of other expressions. However, to anyone else on the team, he was always the epitome of cool as a cucumber.

"I know," Rossi answered evenly.

"How did you know?" Prentiss asked, confused. "You just got here."

"I dropped him off at the airport."

Then a barrage of questions hit him at once, all before Rossi even found his seat.

Rossi sat in silence until everyone calmed down. Dave never competed with babble.

JJ got the ball rolling by speaking up first. "Rossi, why didn't you tell us?"

"I didn't know myself until today."

Aaron caught the expressions that alerted him to Morgan's anger just before he hissed, "Why didn't you try to stop him?"

All attention was focused on Rossi, and he was confident that his friend would handle it in his own way. Happy to let him take over, Aaron sat back and watched events unfold.

"It wasn't my place to try to stop him from doing what was right for him," he answered, as though he was addressing a classroom of school children.

Prentiss seemed to have the more logical mind in the current situation, asking, "Why was it right for him?"

Morgan, still angry, spoke over her. "He shouldn't have left without saying anything."

"He could have come to us." JJ sounded hurt at Reid's departure.

"Okay, okay, one at a time. He's had a lot going on in his head recently. So much so, that it's been giving him headaches. And, no, he couldn't go to any one of you, because you don't know him."

"Yes, we do! He's one of the team," Prentiss sharply announced, clearly affronted by Rossi's statement.

Rossi got out of his seat and quietly placed his hands on the desk before him. "NO. YOU. DON'T."

It was one of the few times that Rossi actually raised his voice, and everyone around the table immediately became quiet. Dave knew Reid the best and he had something to get off his chest.

"Not one of you actually knew him outside of this job."

"We tried, but he wouldn't let us in," Derek defensively offered.

Looking at Morgan, Rossi quietly emphasized his next words, "You didn't try hard enough."

Making eye contact with each of the agents in turn, he made his statement.

"I got to know more about him in my first twelve months than ANY of you bothered to find out in the five years that he was here. And do you know what made the difference? Huh? I'll tell you what the difference was. I LISTENED TO HIM! I didn't bombard him with personal questions. I didn't fob him off when he went on a ramble. I didn't treat him like the unit mascot. I didn't mess his hair, calling him 'Pretty Boy'. I respected the person, not just his brain... it earned me his trust, and that is something that young man... yes, young man, not BOY... has had very few reasons to give over the years.

"Did you ever wonder why he built walls around himself? You're a bunch of profilers; it can't be all that difficult to figure out. Child genius? All people ever wanted out of him was the information held within his brain and its phenomenal processing speed. All his life, he's either been bullied or used. Couple that with the images we see on an almost daily basis... he was bound to crack at some time.

"Do any of you know _anything _personal about him, other than his home address, or what you can find on the internet?" He homed in on Garcia, knowing from Spencer that she had used her technical skills to find out what she could. "Believe me, there's plenty out there, but none of it tells you about Spencer Reid, the man. Did you know his favorite color or his thoughts on people and the universe? All Strauss saw when she recruited him was a bunch of brownie points. What did you see in him?"

As Rossi asked that question, he looked straight at Morgan, who was sitting opposite him. Rossi's hard gaze made Morgan shrink back into his chair a little.

He let his words sink in for a minute before continuing.

"It's irrelevant now. He's gone, and it's most unlikely that he'll be coming back... at least not to the BAU."

"Where's he gone?" The inquisitive but small voice of Garcia asked the question they all wanted to know the answer to.

"Europe. And no, I don't know when he'll be coming back to the good ol' US of A."

Rossi turned from the table. "Good luck finding a replacement. Call me when we have a case."

Rossi left the building and went home, feeling a little guilty himself. Not because he'd torn a strip out of his colleagues, but because he too should have realized what was going on in Reid's head and seen the signs sooner. All he could do now was damage control. He was going to do his best to ensure Spencer found a much healthier state of mind, and that his mother was well looked after in his absence. He had the funds, and in true Italian style, he looked after those he considered to be his family.

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**A/N - Hope you enjoyed this fic. If so please join me over at The Writers Coffee Shop, where the remainder of this fic will be posted. Sorry to have to do it this way, but given the ffn rules and the eventual lemons in this story, I feel it is for the best. I use the same pen-name there. **

This story is be M/M. I have noticed that some people have taken advantage of ffn's new guest review facility (albeit you can delete the reviews), to leave nasty comments re gay fiction. If you are one of these people please note that whilst I appreciate that you have your own opinion, I too have mine and they won't be changing. Therefore, please do not waste your time submitting it to me. In the profilers outlook, the fact that you have read the story and left a review, says more about you than your words.


	2. Chapter 2

As per my A/N at the end of chapter one, the next chapter of this story has now been posted on The Writers Coffee Shop. If you go to the menu option Most Recent, you can find it there. Alternatively you can go to Categories and select Criminal Minds and Slash as a sub option.

This story will be posted on a weekly basis, unless of course I get impatient and post early. lol. Like today, I couldn't wait until the weekend.

If you have any problems navigating TWCS – give me a shout.

If you select one of the fav options – don't forget you have to also click on the 'submit' button, before it is activated. Selecting fav on it's own will not work. TWCS will then send you a notification when an update comes through. Please persevere, I'd love to hear from you.

A huge thank you to everyone who has read, reviewed, alerted and fav'd.

To Seph: Guest, it was fantastic to hear from you, sorry that I couldn't reply.

This is my first foray into writing anything Criminal Minds and if it goes well, I may write another more in depth crime/drama in the future.


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